Sprite's Keeper

Thank VERIZON for Phone Based Internet!

I could say "Thank God", but in light of the season and the what not, I think I'll keep this post off the blasphemous side. (Just for today though. Tomorrow, we'll see.)

HeatherPride over at The Short Bus handed out some awards yesterday, and since I was going to write about this anyway, I asked if I could weasel my way in on her hilariousness (Typepad is warning me about making up words, but the damn spell check couldn't even recognize "dreidel" so I'm just going to continue with my inventionous ways.) and can only hope that she gave me her blessing since I am not one to go back and confirm things more than never, so, yeah.

On with the story..

I walked into Big Lots! on Friday evening to search for a last minute gift for one of the nephews (if this is one of the relatives reading, don't worry, it wasn't your kid. I got your son's gift last January since he was first on my mind and first to be wrapped. Are we good?) and happened upon a huge display of big ticket items like Guitar-Hero-Rock-Star-Whatever-the-thing-is-called-since-we-don't-own-a-Wii-or-an-Xbox-or-fill-in-the-blank-of-whatever-server-is-required-to-play and other items of larger than shelf-stackable nature. (Man, Typepad usually calls me out for spelling, I wonder what it would say about Grammar..)

I saw something I couldn't believe. A Disney Princess Talking Kitchen Set. A toddler size piece of pink plastic guaranteed to make Sprite squee with joy and embark on many imaginary adventures which would involve stuffing her dolls into the oven. (I'm told this is normal, but if she continues into her elementary years, we may need to work on some underlying issues.) I looked at the price expecting to see something larger than I could afford given the brand name and size of the play set. $50.00. Not TOO bad, although our previous shopping trips had already fulfilled Sprite's gift roles and our checking account wasn't holding any more auditions. Then, I saw the smaller print. "Save up to 37%!"

I'm a sucker for a deal.

I whipped out my cell phone and dialed John. "Stop me from buying this."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm at Big Lots and I am looking at a Disney Princess Kitchen that is perfect for Sprite."

"Really.." His pause told me he was intrigued.

"Yeah, for only fifty dollars and the sign says we would be saving up to 37%." (Of course, I had to add the "only".)

"..That's a good price." Still intrigued.

"Oomph!"

"Jen, are you okay?"

"Yup, almost got run over by another shopper." ..as I lifted my prize into the cart. I was going to get a "yes".

"Well, I was thinking of getting Sprite something from me."

Pfft. Take my glory when I found it? "Sure, hon. We can make it from you." Uh-huh. Right.

"Buy it."

I had my answer. I walked my daughter's favorite Christmas gift through the store as I looked for a gift for my nephew. (I know my kid. She would love this set and would most likely play with it every day.) Finally procuring his favorite Christmas gift, (Um, really not sure if this will be a favorite. In fact, it may not even rank the top ten. I just looked for his age bracket and took a shot.) (I'm not good at basketball, so chances are my shot could have missed, but he lives on the other side of the state so I won't be there to see his disappointment joy when he opens said present.) I noticed the large line of people standing at the check out counter (of course, only one cashier) and moseyed over to the back of the queue.

While waiting, I took out my phone and started searching the Internet for prices on the kitchen, curious to see exactly what it was going for in the retailers to be fetching such a bargain here at Big Lots!.

As the line progressed, my search progressed, only more slowly. I was finally able to pull up a national chain's pricing on the set. And their price was? $48.98. No sale. No big promotion.

Not only was I not saving any money by buying the set here, I was actually spending more.

I finally got up to the register and showed my phone display to the less than enthusiastic cashier. "This store has it for less than you have it." She could see the store's logo on the miniature screen.

"So?" (Trust me. I'm going the verbatim route here.)

"Does this seem like a fair price to you?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "No?" (Yes, her response was phrased as a question. Remember, verbatim.)

"Can I speak to a manager?"

She cocked her head and smirked. "Do you think he's gonna do anything about it?" (Verbatim!)

"Well, then, I'm not taking it. I'll just take this." I motioned to my nephew's gift. (If I name it, I'll be busted and I'm just not that stupid. Wordy, but not stupid.)

The cashier rang up my purchase and motioned to the kitchen set. "Are you going to put that back?"

As if!

"No?" I responded, phrasing my comeback identically with her tone. (I'm usually not that bitchy.) (Yes, I am.) (Never mind.)

So, Big Lots!? More like Big NOTS!.

I hereby bequeath you your Short Bus 1st Annual Bah Humbug Award for trying to squeeze one past this semi-price conscious consumer and recommend you remove the exclamation point from your name. You're just not worth getting THAT excited over.

Tampering With Tradition

Christmas is four days away. Hanukkah begins tonight and lasts for eight sunsets. (Hold the phones! Little Facebook friends all spamming each other with Hanukkah wishes convinced me that Hanukkah actually began LAST NIGHT! It is Hanukkah NOW! Me, a Jew, didn't even realize my own freakin' holiday had started! OY! I'm gonna be pretty busy come Yom Kippur...)

This is our first year to combine the two events and make it magical for a two year old.

We have nothing. (!)

When Sprite was first born, we spent our holidays on the East side of Florida with John's family and mine since we were more interested in being with everyone we loved and she really didn't have a say in the matter. We made these plans knowing that the time would come when she was old enough to start participating in Santa's game of setting out cookies for the fat man (he'd better be good to her or next year, he's getting sugar free) and waking up Christmas morning to a mountain of presents (okay, maybe not a mountain, a really tall hill, okay, maybe not a really tall hill, but a definite speed bump of gifts) and playing with Mommy and Daddy all morning as relatives call and come at various hours to join in the festivities and wrap it all up into a warm holiday memory with a big red bow on it. We set this time frame for Sprite's second birthday and then went about life, completely forgetting about it.

The time has come. (..the walrus said) (Quick, what famous animated movie is that line from?)

Sprite is now two. John and I made the announcement to our East Coast families that we will be parking it at home this year and were met with moans and groans and "Do it next year!", but we're digging our heels and staying true to our cause. (We've only wavered twice in our decision, but we're still staying, right, John? ...John?)

Living in a blended faith family, Sprite will of course spin the dreidel as she should and watch as we "light" the candles on the Mickey Mouse menorah her mother so lovingly locked away so curious size 3T hands couldn't get their grubby paws on "Mickey! Sprite's Mickey! Gimme!!!!!" stored for her daughter to enjoy for many years to come. (When I air quote the word light, I mean it. We will pretend to light the wick for most of the nights. Do you know what a bitch it is to clean wax out of a menorah branch?)

I had envisioned making latkes for my toddler to enjoy with some applesauce, but dude, I'm tired. I barely had time to make some cookies for my office's potluck tomorrow. Putting a half-witted stressed out woman in front of a hot skillet spitting oil is not what I picture as a fond holiday memory. So, latkes? Later.

If we find the tree remote, we will light the tree, and I did get "The Night Before Christmas" on clearance last year so John will probably read that to Sprite before bedtime.

But our holiday is still missing something, tradition. This is our first year of doing it our way and we have no ideas!

I asked John about his family memories and they include opening presents on Christmas Eve (Okay, I have to ask. Why do some families open their gifts on Christmas Eve? My memories as an outsider always included the kids having to be hog-tied to their beds so the Claus-man could sneak down their chimney, raid their fridge, and leave a few trinkets after Midnight so the little buggers fresh faced innocents could rush the tree the next morning and see what Kris Kringle left within the tree's undercarriage.

We're looking for something, anything to help ring in Christmas and give our kid a nice holiday and a happy (if somewhat foggy) memory.

Question number one: What traditions does your family do? What do you have to include every year or it's just not Christmas/ Hanukkah/ Kwanzaa/ Festivus without it?

Question number two: Do you mind if we steal your tradition?

Save us from Holiday Hell!

HASAY won't like this..

 

"Happy birthday dear Bryan, happy birthday to you!"

 

Lee: "Sprite, look here! Smile for Aunt Lee!"

 

Jen: "Ooh, there's cookies?"

Dad: "Want one, Jen?"

Jen: "Nope, I have to be good."

 

Dad: "Lee, what are you doing?"

Lee: (snickering) "Oh, nothing."

 

Jen: "Mnffp!"

Lee: "Gotcha."

 

Jen: "It's a cheat day!"

Lee: "Hey, John, what's Jen's blog password? I think her HASAY friends will find this VERY interesting!"

Spin Cycle: Are you naughty or nice?

Sleigh blogs ring, are you listening?

Didn't like that?

Well, you'll love this!

We have our first Secret Santa Spins up and ready!

Debbie over at Buzzin' By with her thoughts on Teenie Thoughts

Phhhst over at Pseudonumous High School Teacher with her thoughts on Of Thistles and Maple Leaves -Updated Sunday! New to the Spin Cycle!

Ali over at Aloicious: Life in the SLC with her thoughts on The Un Mom -Updated Monday!

Laufa over at Morgan Madness with her thoughts on ...is this thing on? -Updated Tuesday!

Middle Aged Woman over at Unmitigated with her thoughts on Literal Dan -Updated Tuesday!

Arwen over at Spors in the Desert with her thoughts on Life with 9ndHouse -Updated Tuesday!

Petra over at The Wise (*Young*) Mommy with her thoughts on Clark Kent's LUNCHBOX -Updated Tuesday!

Wicked Step Mom over at Life and Times of a Wicked Step Mom with her thoughts on Good Father -Updated Tuesday!

Ferd Crotte over at The Best Parts with his thoughts on The Junk Drawer -Updated Tuesday!

D.M. Wright over at D.M. Wright Books with her thoughts on My Life For The World To See -Updated Tuesday!

Lisa over at Boondock Ramblings with her thoughts on Notes From Inside My Head -Updated Tuesday!

Carrie over at Cole Pack with her thoughts on My Life In A Nutshell -Updated Tuesday!

Cyndi over at The Adventures of HarryJack with her thoughts on The Pioneer Woman -Updated Wednesday!

Michelle over at Michelle's A Mom with her thoughts on Half As Good As You -Updated Wednesday!

Heinous over at Irregulary Periodic Ruminations with his thoughts on I Need A Martini Mom -Updated Wednesday!

DeeMarie over at My Life In A Nutshell with her thoughts on Morgan Madness -Updated Wednesday!

Tina over at Teenie Thoughts with her thoughts on Sandie Simply Says -Updated Wednesday!

Michele over at It's A Dog's Life with her thoughts on Us And Them -Updated Thursday! Stocking stuffer!

Helen+Ilana=Hi over at Pangelli Pastimes with her thoughts on The Inner Minx -Updated Thursday! Win another spin of the dreidel!

Keely over at The Un Mom with her thoughts on Get The Stink Off -Updated Thursday! Another present under the tree!

Remember, you have until Friday, December 26th to get those Secret Santa Spins in!

Want to join? Email me with a list of your favorite blogs (about 5 or so) before Midnight, Christmas Eve and I'll send you your Spin. Come on! It's just as sweet as Christmas cookies and half the fat!

Partial Nudity

I've been seeing some beautiful trees shown around the blogosphere. Stocking hung with care, decorations in and outside the home, lights strung about in a festive pattern, eliciting the spirit of the season, invoking the love of the holidays, stirring the feelings of yuletide and generosity.

Sigh.

You won't find that here.

Behold our tree!

 

Please note the lack of ornaments. Please note how the lights are not turned on. (We don't know where Sprite put the remote. Seriously. We let her play with it for one minute and poof! Gone. It's probably hiding out with the last three pairs of shoes that have mysteriously walked off within seconds. This is why we are leery of play dates. It's not about fights amongst the kids, it's about losing the other child between the play tunnel and snack time.)

Need a better look?

 

There you go. Yes, our tree is basically naked from the waist down. It IS understandable that we decorated this way since our toddler is especially grabby with the shiny things (ornaments, tinsel, the fridge-she claims it's the magnets, I think it's the waffles in the freezer compartment) and it's harder for her to take down a tree than a glass orb, so yay us for using our brains. Another excuse is that we haven't been home for the holidays for the past 6 years and put the tree up maybe once or twice in that time span, so a lot of our ornaments either soured or spoiled (some of them had grease circles on them which were unexplainable, others were shattered from years of being pushed around the garage and stacked and re-stacked) and were thrown away as we unpacked our slowly dwindling display of cheer.

 

Ooh, look! Mickey Mouse is represented! See? The kid had some influence on this tree.

 

Blue's Clues for the toddler who never waits around long enough for Blue to find her first clue.

 

We have a little influence in the tree as well.

I won't show you the outside of our house since there are no lights up and John claims the lawn needs to be mowed. (He's okay with the neighbors pointing and laughing, but balks at the blogosphere seeing some errant blades of grass.

We do have a lone light up deer which I won in my office's progressive gift exchange, you know, the ones where everyone draws a number, and the first person opens a gift from the pile, and the next people up have the chance to steal an opened gift from the ones who went before. That's right, the one Jew in the office growled at anyone who tried to take her Christmas lawn ornament. I vowed to set it on our lawn for the next year and placed it into the garage for safe keeping. Now, it's been sitting in a place of honor on top of a tool box that my headlights train on as I enter the garage. In fact, I use it exclusively as my stopping point. If I nudge the deer box with my bumper, I need to stop. Deer in the headlights, you say? Have I thought of that? Uh.. yeah?

So, there you have it. Our Christmas decorations. Do you feel like your tree doesn't measure up to the others? Pull this site up and compare away! You'll end up smiling smugly. (You're already snickering now, aren't you?)

But I like to think of it this way. Come the New Year, it will take me precisely 30 minutes to get the ornaments packed away, the tree taken down, and even switch out the laundry while you'll probably still be neck deep in extension cords trying to figure out how your tree's remote somehow came to turn on the television. (If my toddler was at your home at any point during the season, it's entirely possible.)

Not feeling so smug now, are you?

Spin Cycle: In The Beginning

July 24, 2007

"Dear Sprite,
    Your daddy got me this notebook so I could use it to take notes, but I would much rather write to you instead. I hope I can give this to you later in life so you can find out some things that your daddy and I may not remember to tell you..."

Those two sentences of a note to my then eight month old daughter was truly the beginning of Sprite's Keeper. John had given me a notebook with Sprite's smiling face on the cover and a little love letter on the inside to inspire me. I was supposed to take it to work and use it for the stress over there, but I didn't want to waste those thoughts on such precious paper. So, I began a memoir for her instead. One problem came out of it though. It was dry. Very dry.

I would write about what was going on in her life, but I felt I needed to keep the snark out of it. I thought that if I were to pass it down to her (I have it in a safe place and she will receive it one day.), I didn't want her to think I was making fun of her milestones even if I really wanted to lash out at her teething or drooling or the time her tail finally came off. (That was a blessed day..)

I've never been good with keeping a diary or a journal. I loved to write, but my life wasn't interesting. At all. Until Sprite.

When Sprite came along, she adopted her nickname by the time she turned one. Why Sprite? Think Tinker Bell as a brunette. I'm afraid the many photos I've forced down your throats don't do her a lick of justice when it comes to capturing the devilish twinkle in her eyes when she's about to do something, the intent in her features when she's begun her personal mission, the passion in her movement as she catapults through life at such an amazing speed, my head spins daily.

As I was raising my child, working full time, and working with my husband to keep our house in working order, I realized that I had lost sight of myself. I had lost me. Everything was Sprite, and if it wasn't Sprite, it was Sprite related. John told me to get a hobby. (I wonder if he regrets that suggestion now..)

I had been getting weekly reminders from Baby Center on my child's growth (for some reason Baby Center thought she was three years old) and started checking out their message boards. There, I discovered Momformation. Interested with the site, I began reading through the Parenting Federation and found Amalah, already a powerful force in the mommy blogger world. As I read through her archives, I found so much of myself in there, I felt the pull to begin one of these blog things myself.

I researched for a couple of days, decided on Typepad as a platform, signed up, and when it asked for my blog name, I could think of nothing other than Sprite as my muse. I really don't know what made me tack on the "Keeper" since there are maybe 3 blogs in all out there with "Sprite" in the title. I thought it flowed. I wasn't sure how long I would stay with it, so I barely thought about the title. I thought, if I hate it, I can always change it.

January 23, 2008, I posted for the first time. My topic wasn't even related to Sprite, which was a little ironic. The ideas started rushing out. Poems that had been sitting in my head for months suddenly had an outlet. Funny little things my kid was doing or weird facts of parenthood suddenly had a voice. The part of me I thought I had lost grew stronger, I was whole again. This blog became the best therapy I had never had. 

The Spin Cycle started as an experiment. Many bloggers have run into situations where they write a post only to discover someone else has written about the exact same thing or something eerily similar and posted before they got the chance to. Then that blogger has a choice. Dump the post they worked on or post it and fear someone will accuse them of copying.

I ran into this myself when I posted about our run over in with a baby alligator and someone mentioned in the comments that Alice Bradley from Finslippy had also posted about an animal encounter not even a week prior (after I had already drafted mine) (and hers was much funnier) and I felt like a fraud.

Enter the Spin Cycle. I wanted to see how many twists could be spun on the same topic. I was going to call it Potluck Friday. Kirst talked me out of it. Thank you, Kirst!

(Little secret: The Spin Cycle was also incepted as a way to get certain blogger friends of mine to post more. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't. I won't call them out, but they know who they are.)

I love this site and I love the friends I have come across in the blogosphere. It has evolved into such a main part of my life that I cannot imagine a future without it, without you. Sprite's Keeper is my virtual playground and every Friday is my virtual play date with all of you.

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I have learned so much more about this week's Spinners than ever before! Finally, we asked the question that surely wandered in the back of your mind when perusing a site and wondering what makes that blogger tick. And look who answered:

Cyndi over at The Adventures of HarryJack

HeatherPride over at Riding the Short Bus 

Captain Dumbass over at Us and Them -

Tattooed Minivan Mom over at The Scattered Mind of a Tattooed Minivan Mom - New to the Spin Cycle!

Casey over at Half As Good As You 

Heinous over at Irregularly Periodic Ruminations 

Sandie over at Sandie Simply Says 

Middle Aged Woman over at Unmitigated 

DeeMarie over at My Life In A Nutshell 

Lisette over at Coupon Queen of Corning -New to the Spin Cycle!

Jen over at Blissfully Caffeinated

Petra over at The Wise Young Mommy 

Wicked Step Mom over at Life and Times of a Wicked Step Mom

Arwen over at Spors in the Desert 

Rachel over at Burning the Souffle -New to the Spin Cycle!

Ginger over at When Ginger Snaps -(Holiday Newsletter Spin!)

Sher over at Sherindipity 

Debbie over at Buzzin' By 

Jennifer over at Whoa My Horses -New to the Spin Cycle!

Tina over at Teenie Thoughts 

D.M.Wright over at D.M. Wright Books 

Sammanthia over at The Edge Of Insanity 

Bessie Viola over at bessie viola 

Good Father over at Good Father 

Michele over at It's A Dog's Life 

Ginger over at When Ginger Snaps 

Michelle over at Michelle's A Mom 

Laufa over at Morgan Madness 

Krystal over at Mommy's Escape 6.0 

Carrie over at Cole Pack 

Rachel over at The Ramblings of Rachel 

Rikki over at Cowgirls Like Me -New to the Spin Cycle!

Keely over at A Letter To Xander

Keely over at The Un Mom -New to the Spin Cycle! (Or is she???)

Jen over at Coconut Belly -Updated today! Fresh Spin!

Heather over at Geez Louize!!! -Updated today! Fresh Spin!

Leslie over at Captain Crazy -Updated Saturday the 20th! Fresh Spin! New to the Spin Cycle!

Please take the time to welcome the new Spinners and share a laugh and smile with the veterans!

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You've been sending me your emails with your short list of favorite blogs and now it's time to spread some holiday cheer (as well as a little linky love!).

We have a nice number of people all set to Spin, only they don't know what they were doing. Well, based on another idea by Ms. Steenky Bee herself, Jenboglass, we are going to do our own version of Secret Santa. That's right!

Beginning tomorrow morning (or possibly tonight since I'm really excited to start the Santa's Spinning!), I will email those already signed up with their subject. From there, your Spin Cycle assignment is to write a send up of this blogger and why you like him or her. You can reference the posts that got you hooked in the first place, or what keeps you coming back for more. Make it as creative as you want! (Please check with the subject first if you plan on posting pictures from their site. Some people have been known to be a little iffy with their pictures going elsewhere. Just covering the bases.)

In light of that last disclaimer, when you link up your finished post, please send a link over to your subject so they can know just how much they're appreciated!

I will reiterate, make it as creative as you want! No limits here, people! Time to talk about who you stalk! (You like that phrase? Mine! Okay, fine. I'll share.)

The rules again:

1. I will email you with your Secret Santa subject.

2. Write about them and provide a link so we can discover a new great blog or just rediscover what we like about one we know.

3. When you publish, email the blogger you are writing about to let them know they're being honored!

Those who were waiting to see what the whole secret was about, you still have time to join! (And possibly discuss your trust issues..) Just email me with a list of your favorite blogs and get your assignment!

I will close down the entries by Wednesday evening, Christmas Eve, since all Spins will be due by Friday the 26th and I can only access my personal email in the evenings. So to be fair to everyone Spinning, if you want in, get me your list by Wednesday evening, sooner if you want to start earlier. Every night, I will check my email and get back to you as quickly as possible.

So, if you haven't already and want to join in the holiday fun, email me at spriteskeeper[at]live[dot]com and provide a list of your favorite blogs. Set your sleighs for Spin and we'll see you next Friday on the Spin Cycle!

Happy Ho-Ho-Ho to you!

Ten Things I Hate About U

I just had to title it this way. Bessie Viola did a meme, I liked it,  and I actually volunteered to do one. I know, crazy. I swear, I haven't been myself lately...

Alright, I am not passing this one on, but it looks a little difficult so I will try it. Because I am crazy. (Come on, I already went over this in the above paragraph.)

RULES: You leave a comment on this post if you want to play, and I’ll assign you a letter. Write 10 things you love that begin with your assigned letter, and post it on your blog. Lather, rinse, repeat. Don't do it! It's evil, EVIL!!!

I know the title says "Ten things I hate about U", but do you think it would have worked if I had inserted "love" into it instead? Of course not!

1. Upholstery. There is something quite nice about sinking into a couch after a long day and letting the plush behind your back just absorb the stress. If the husband takes the child and gives you the night off, bonus! 

2. Unity. Trying to make your husband see things your way is one thing. Getting your kid in on your game plan and uniting to overthrow him is another. (This rule does not apply to the kid for some reason. Damn child laws..)

3. Us. I love everything about this word. It encompasses my family, people I am with, the country as a whole, Homosapiens at large. How could such a small word take on such a large persona? Mind boggling..

4. Umbrellas. You gotta love umbrellas! They keep you dry from the weather, falling leaves, hot sun, birds who couldn't make it to the bathroom in time..

5. Unaltered. Too much makeup = not enough person. It's one thing to play up your features. It's another to change them.

6. Ugly ducklings. They always grow up to be beautiful swans. At least, that's what the book tells us.

7. Unicorns. The list wasn't basing everything on reality, was it? What's not to like about unicorns? They're like horses, but with a handle! And I heard they fart sunshine and rainbows. Rock on, unicorns, rock on.

8. Utensils. Now if the kid would learn that a utensil is used for procuring food and not rapping out drum beats on the beagle, we'd get somewhere. (The beagle doesn't mind. She'll actually change positions for better percussion.)

9. United States. I AM glad to be an American, no matter how screwed up the economy is right now. (If I said "proud", you would have a song in your head the rest of the day.) (I bet mentioning that probably did just that, huh? Sorry.)

10. Uniqueness. I write because I am. You think because you are. Everyone has a different fingerprint, thought, feeling, take, Spin, and that makes them special. No two snowflakes are alike. The same applies to people.

So, there it is. Bessie, I am tired, but appreciative for the challenge. I wouldn't say I succeeded, but I know I didn't fail. (And if that makes so sense, meh.)

Oh, another word I like? Ultra! Every time you see a product with varying levels of effectiveness, you always want the one with Ultra on it, right? And it usually costs the same as the less effective one... Why is that?

All right. I promise, this is my last one. Not doing meme's anymore, unless one really piques my interest.

Understood? (Ooh! I could have used that one!)

Universe. (Seriously! Take my blog away!)

Unilateral. (Okay, now it's just sad..)

Knock! Knock! Guest Who?

It's me! Only it's not me. (Er, I should have written this before working out. I'm sure the words would make more sense then.)

I'm actually over at Casey's home today, Half As Good As You, and I brought the kid with me. Totally last minute, couldn't find a cyber-sitter, so she tagged along.

Casey is busy dealing with one child getting over a double ear infection and another child getting tubes in and his tonsils and adenoids out since he is a constant recipient of ear infections. (The gift that keeps on giving, apparently.) So, while she's stressing over Graham's surgery late this afternoon, she called upon some of us who owed her favors to come over and tidy up the place. And you know how I like to clean.. so I jumped on it. And the guilty side of me also stood up since she guested for me last week.

Quick side note: Graham's procedure is scheduled for late this afternoon. Folks, is there a reason other than SADISTIC as to why a scheduler would arrange a two year old to go without food ALL DAY before something that is probably scaring the Blues Clues out of him? Would it have been a major inconvenience to maybe push the poor kid to the front of the line so he could get it over and done with without too much crying and waiting and suckiness for him and his already stressed out parents? Maybe Casey and Jamie needed a challenge. Hell, let's just close Dunkin Donuts and REALLY make their day!

(Yup, reading it all now. I should have definitely written this before the treadmill. Let's just blame it on low blood sugar..)

Oh, one more side note: Casey, if you're reading this, if you decide to complain about the fact that they scheduled Graham so late in the day, maybe you should wait until he's in recovery before voicing your opinion. Just a suggestion.

So, head on over, give a kind word for Graham's expedicious recovery so he can be back to lobbing toys at loving on his little sister in no time.

No, really, click over. Now.

Nothing else to see here, people!

Re-gifting

"I just wanted to remind you that the kids will be taking pictures with Santa on Wednesday. I noticed that Sprite's Santa gift wasn't in the pile."

I looked up from where I was crouched and receiving my greeting hug from Sprite into the smiling eyes of the teacher. I got the message. She was gently letting me know what I had been trying so hard to ignore.

The parents had received a flier announcing Santa's arrival for this week. Within the demands for $5.00 for a picture of my darling (Jewish) daughter trading comments with the Claus himself was another request for each child to be provided with one wrapped gift for Santa to present as if he actually bought the damn thing.

As much as I am playing along with giving Sprite her first Christmas and talking Santa up, I balked at having to provide both money for a picture that was going to play out like a crap shoot (I can cross fingers for a smiling pose, but would have to make do and pay for a screamer if that's what came down the pike.) and for a gift. While the gift request had included the suggestion to keep the price under five bucks, I had to think realistically. What could I possibly find as a viable toy for under five dollars? Especially when I think the kid has too much crap already?

So, I had decided to forget the whole thing and hope they just take the hint that we weren't interested in taking part and find a way to keep Sprite out of the process.

Then the teacher told me the kids would all be doing this together and opening their gifts as a class. Hint, hint. You don't want Sprite to be left out, do you?

And I remembered.

I remembered being the one kid in the class, the odd man out, quietly singled out due to my religion and the fact that I didn't believe in Santa Claus, not asked to participate so as not to call attention to my faith when invariably, it always did.

I remembered the teachers who tried to involve me by giving me different projects to do during art time. "Jenny, why don't you make a menorah while the others are making Santa's beard?" I could have so made a rocking beard for the fat man, but counted out candles instead, four on each side with the shamash candle in the middle. No green or red construction paper on my desk.

I remembered feeling anxious every time December rolled around, not looking forward to the inclusion and exclusion of it all. I had many friends, no issue there, but the simple fact of not being able to share in what Santa was bringing, watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, and the music teacher having to include one Hanukkah song in the Christmas chorus recital to accommodate me was worse than ignoring the issue.

I remembered that vague feeling of not belonging. I remembered the way I felt like I stood out, even if it wasn't obvious to others. Why would I subject my daughter to it just because I didn't want to buy her another gift?

"I'll take care of it," I assured the teacher, wondering where I was going to find a gift.

When we arrived home, I spied a merchandise bag from our trip to Walt Disney World. While we had avoided big ticket items like $20.00 Minnie Mouse dolls, we had indulged her in a Mickey Mouse bracelet (clunky pink jewel tone mouse ears on a stretchy band) and a couple of Goofy and Pluto figurines she had liked and tried to steal in the Animal Kingdom. (Turns out those strollers have a longer reaching span than I figured or I could have saved a lot of money in the land of Mickey.) I picked up the stuffed Goofy and considered it.

I would be re-gifting to my own child with a toy I had already given her just a week prior. Could I do this? I thought of the options. She wouldn't tell anyone she already had it. I could easily get away with this fraudulent present, even if only for this year. Next year would be more difficult as her verbal repertoire will undoubtedly increase.

I knew I wouldn't budge on my earlier stance of refusing to purchase yet another novelty for my two year old who wouldn't care either way what was lying within the paper. She would be excited with the general mayhem of the flying sparkling paper and the chatter of other toddlers as they fought over each other's prizes and teachers tried desperately to restore order to a classroom already far gone in the merriment of not knowing what it was that was bringing about this feeling, but rising to the occasion nonetheless.

The toy wouldn't matter. The moment would. I would make sure I gave Sprite the moment of belonging, the moment of being one with the others, even if I was re-gifting a little Goofy doll.

I wrapped the little doll in bright red tissue paper and stuck it inside a small gift bag then tucked a five dollar bill into my wallet to hand over the next morning. My mind was made up. Goofy was going to make a second first impression on my daughter.

Re-gifting would be worth the moment. Five dollars would be worth the memory.

HASAY: Week Something or Other: I'm Taking a Pass!

HASAY: Want the details? Click on the link. Don't worry. It won't hurt. Much..

John and I had a long talk on Sunday. We both felt guilty for what we had done. The week had gotten the best of us. We cheated. On our diets. And you know what? It felt GREAT!

I'm working on some posts now about Disney World, but there are so many thoughts running through my head (now why can't THAT burn calories?), this will take a little bit of time. So, let me take today, since HASAY usually takes up my Monday's to tell you more about the food. The FOOD. THE FOOD!

One thing I will confirm, try to stay away from the park food. (unless you're eating in one of the restaurants or visiting one of the specialty bakeries) It's exactly what you would expect. Expensive, sub-par, and guaranteed to back you up faster than rush hour gridlock, which isn't pretty when you're only halfway through the hour long queue for the Everest coaster.

The hotels however? Come closer. They won't bite. You will..

We stayed at the Contemporary Resort, the closest hotel to the Magic Kingdom entrance. Literally, we could step outside our room door and see the castle. But no, this post is not about our time at Disney. It's about our meals.

Staying in this hotel, we needed some fast food, so we checked out a quick service self seating area called the Tempo Grab and Go. (I think it's called that. Since this is not officially a review, I don't have to officially research what I'm talking about. Officially.) The prices run about five bucks for a kid's meal which has 2 sides and a drink, and these sides are not your typical "You want fries with that?" variety. They also run to grapes, applesauce (the unsweetened kind), carrot sticks, and a cookie. (One caveat on the grapes though. Try to limit their appearances to uncredited cameos if you have a toddler. Too many grapes does not a pleasant diaper make. I found this out twice on Saturday morning while visiting Becca and her daughter Abigail. Becca, again, REALLY sorry about that! And your home is lovely, by the way!)

The adult meals went from around seven dollars to twelve and ran the gamut from hamburgers to hot turkey sandwiches (made with apple butter, apple slices, and Brie on toasted challah bread) with a side of chilled green bean salad to blackened Mahi with some other amazing side dish you've probably never heard of, thought the combination would taste obnoxious, and then closed your eyes at the first bite because you needed to block one of your senses to focus more clearly on this absolute magnificence going on in your mouth. The portions were huge, more then enough for John and me to share AND feel full, and we were able to keep our culinary spending down to a minimum.

We coveted this little oasis within spitting distance of the monorail stop and stopped by every morning for breakfast, a couple of lunches, and even a couple of dinners.

We did make one reservation for a nicer restaurant called the California Grill, which is nestled on the top floor of the Contemporary with perfect views of the Magic Kingdom. The prices ran from thirteen dollars to forty per meal. At least, this was what the Concierge desk told me. So, I made reservations with the intention of eating a moderately priced meal made by some frou-frou chef who got his training from a school I would not be able to pronounce, and still keeping my wallet full, and also scoring front row seats for the fireworks show at the Kingdom.

Every plan has a flaw.

After being seated, we perused the menu. I focused on a dish of Sonoma goat cheese ravioli with wild mushroom stuffing nestled in a broth of some kind of reduction. The dish cost $13.00. John had decided on a three cheese flatbread with basil pesto for $15.00. When the server arrived, I placed my order and she immediately interrupted with, "That's not all, right?"

"Er, yes." My hesitant reaction must have told her right away that her tip would not be riding on the amount of money we were spending.

"Oh, sweetie. That's not enough. That's only a first course. You only get one ravioli."

One ravioli? For thirteen dollars?

I smiled weakly, my naivety showing around the edges of my blush. "How big is the ravioli?"

She made a small circle with her thumbs and forefingers. Um, yeah. I would need at least an open palm to feel full. This wouldn't cut it. She informed us that the typical order had a first course and a main course, which meant the meal would more likely cost around fifty a head when all was said and done.

I quickly looked over the main menu at the food offered. Braised duck, roasted flank of rabbit, truffles flambeed in more truffles and served with a side of truffles... All of the items looked too complicated. I had already dismissed these dishes as an option when I looked over the menu earlier. As much as I wanted to sit and mingle with people who placed napkins on their laps on a regular basis, I knew I was completely out of my element.

We finally decided to share the flatbread, and John ordered a pear salad to complement his meal and I got my ravioli. My stinking single ravioli. A serving of bread came with the meal and we used that to fill in the dead spots while we sang the praises of the quick serve "layman's eatery" downstairs and promised to stop by there later if the meal didn't do what it was supposed to. We ordered water to complete our meal, which probably earned an eye roll from the server, but we were already too disillusioned to care.

John received the bill and made the quip of how we were spending around twenty dollars for what felt and tasted like a gourmet meal for the three of us in the Grab and Go, and wasting fifty bucks on "bread and water" at the California Grill.

Don't read too much into my complaints on the California Grill. The ravioli was delicious. All three bites of it. And the flatbread was plentiful, more than enough for us to share with each other and Sprite, who had decided her homemade mac and cheese (seven dollars) (excluding the milk) was better off being ground down in her hands rather than her mouth. 

However, the quality was just not worth the lack of quantity to us. We're people on a budget. We like to stick to that budget. We like to get more bang for our buck, or, in this instance, bite for our buck.

We waived our rights to dessert, but dammit, I was getting dessert! We stopped by the Tempo Grab And Go and picked up a caramel dos leches cupcake for me and a black forest cupcake for John. (Can I just steal a tangent and tell you about the dos leches cupcake? Heaven in a paper wrapper, that thing is! Decadent, just enough caramel to tease your senses, and smart to stay only at two leches. Going into tres leches territory would have been overkill, but I will have fond memories of this treat.)

Now, we did do our share of exercise. A lot of walking in both parks we visited and a lot of carrying a toddler while we did it. So, there's that. (And John went to the gym. He reminded me of this while proofreading..)

We haven't weighed ourselves this week and wanted to give ourselves a couple of days of normal eating (normal for us, that is) before we ventured near a scale that only grows hands in which to point accusingly at you.

We'll weigh in next week and give you our scores.

What? HASAY is on a break next week? Oh, well. AFTER Christmas then. Or maybe the New Year. Yeah, that sounds realistic...