Protecting Our Kids (Or Are We Just Blowing Smoke?)

Hi, I'm Jen. I'm a former smoker. It's been.....carry the 2.....multiply the 3....Hell, I don't know anymore.

(Sometimes, I compare smoking to drinking. You never really quit. You just take REALLY long pauses because if you are weak, you could fall right back into the routine.)

I started when I was 20. I really couldn't tell you why. It pissed off my parents. I was raging against the machine. I was attracted to Joe Camel. Pick one. I was addicted, although I was not as hardcore as others. I could go a couple of days without one before it would draw me in again.

I finally stopped pilfering cigarettes from my best friend when I found out I was pregnant. I haven't touched them since. (John is extremely grateful since he is not a smoker and hated the smell of it on my clothes and hair and basically EVERYTHING I was around. Funny that I never noticed the smell until pregnancy gave me hound dog strength sniffers and then I was repulsed by something that had never really bothered me just months earlier.)

I'm not here to preach about the horrors of smoking. I understand the horrors, I understand the risks, and I understand that the smokers understand this as well. They hear it on a regular basis from the nonsmokers. My best friend, Susan, is a smoker and has been hitting up the cancer sticks since we were an impressionable 16. (I'm trying to remember here, Sue. Let me know if I'm off. I mean, off on this. I know I'm just OFF, but the off I'm referring to is, aw, you know what I mean!) I know she knows how harmful they are, and I would love to see her quit, but I will not hound her with pamphlets when she visits, because I will lose my Starbucks friend. And I'm already losing some Starbucks in my area. And that is sad.

I am writing this post because another blog friend, Lisa, over at Boondocks Ramblings, wrote an interesting post about buying a Curious George book for her son Jonathan, since he seemed to like the monkey with the wandering mind. She looked through the book and saw something in one of the pictures which really is shocking these days, a man sitting on a picnic blanket with his family and smoking. (I'm sure that back in the day this illustration was originally produced, the audience would have been more horrified with the clothes the man was wearing than the burning cigarette.)

I don't think her intention was to call attention to the irresponsible artist who drew that illustration, more to point it out in a Ha!Ha! Look what I found! way since this is something you just don't see in kids' literature anymore.

Yet, I know many mothers personally, who would have placed a call to the publisher and demanded a reprint, recant, and burning of the "offensive" books along with full refund and public apology.

Why is smoking so offensive to parents nowadays? Why is it being rated like a language in the films? I'm going to focus on pop culture here, mostly because Lisa found this picture in a children's book, a popular one at that.

In today's All About Health-minded society, we are constantly reminded about the dangers of nicotine and smoking and the steps Hollywood and the media at large are taking to stop smoking from looking enticing to the virgin-eyed teens (RIGHT.). It's even affecting the ratings system in films so parents can go the extra step to make sure their child won't see the character puffing away on film. (Although they only have to look out the car window on the way home to blow that theory to Hell.)

However...

I find it almost impossible to escape tobacco's history in pop culture and the way it was almost celebrated back in the 60's and prior. Almost every classic movie before then had a major character smoking in it. Women were offered cigarettes from their would be heroes, because it was considered classy and polite. ("Cancer, milady?" "Why, thank you, kind sir.") "Thinking" men needed a cigarette or cigar to occupy their fingers and mouths while they chewed the scenery in the days of method acting. It was cool. ( Did the first shot of Danny Zuuko not have a cigarette hanging out of his mouth in "Grease"?) (And yet so many kids with the ever obsessive parents out there know every line to the movie...Whoa, did I just stumble upon a possible contradiction? Yes, I think I did.)

 Smoking is and always has been a lingering smell in pop culture. It even infiltrated the cornerstone of our most revered childhood dream makers. WALT DISNEY was a notorious chain smoker. (They airbrushed the cigarettes out of the pictures in the 80's to make him look more innocent because EVERY picture had a smoldering cigarette in it.) Smoking made it into the animated classics like "101 Dalmations" where Cruela Deville was puffing away.

No matter how much we try to shield our kids from this stuff, they will see it and notice it and may even imitate it. (Does anyone else remember the bubble gum cigarettes back in the 80's where if you puffed really hard, you could blow sugar smoke? That didn't do any damage, right? Right?)

It's our jobs as parents to educate the kiddies and make sure they understand why they shouldn't smoke. It's our jobs to be as proactive as we can to make sure our children understand the dangers of it and how to react positively to peer pressure.

But when they turn 18, our jobs will become more of a consulting gig, and we will have to take a back seat as they decide for themselves whether or not to ride the tobacco train, and no matter how much we tried to shield them or teach them about it, as my parents did with me, some of them will still go ahead and puff away, as I did.

Maybe, this will all be a non-issue by the time Sprite is old enough to be impacted by it, but I will be honest with her and tell her that Mommy did smoke when she was younger. But Daddy didn't. And hopefully, she'll inherit Daddy's common sense.

Comments

[Allinole]

Jen, what a great post. Thanks for sharing.

[Kirsten]

I'm also a reformed smoker stopped about 10 years ago and have never gone back. The smell of cigarettes actually nauseates me now, but like you, I don't preach to anyone about it just praise if they mention quitting.

It was only 30 or so years ago they used to smoke in delivery rooms. My mum used to tell me how she smoked (so that's what's wrong with me..lol) and how they used to give mums a small cup of guiness after giving birth in british hospitals.

Like you I can only warn her of the risks and then hope that I've informed her enough. I like you didn't listen to my mum but will tell Meggers the truth.

Good Post!

[Baba]

I also didn't listen to my mom. When I met your dad I smoked. The day I started dating your dad I quit. It's been about 34 years now. I also smoked to see if I could put one over on my mom. She knew everything like I said before she had eyes in back of her head.

[Susan]

Great post Jen. After I read it I needed to go smoke and collect my thoughts on what I wanted to write :) Yes, I was about 16 when I started and I guess I just wanted to see what all the fuss was about, why people did it! I wonder if thats how it starts with a lot of people? I was never really pressed to do it, or worse. Their are times I do think about quitting, just don't know if I can, or willing to do it yet. Of course if I can go back and do it all over again then I probably wouldn't have started it because, damn do u know how much money I would be saving not spending it on cigs!!!!!

[Lisa]

Good post. Very good. And for the record, not that you said I did this, but just so other mommies know, I did not censor this book. In fact, Jonathan and I read it the other night -- three times (he kept handing it to me...argh!) and now I hate it, not because of the smoking but because I have to read it to my son three times a night.

We ignored the cigarette and so far it hasn't been an issue. I haven't pointed it out to him, he hasn't pointed it out to me and there ya' go.

As for worrying about him starting it...I'll hold off on that for a few more years. His dad had a relationship with the cigarette similar to yours. Me, can't stand them because of asthma and other issues. Also had two grandfather's die of cancer, one definitely because of the cigarettes he smoked. Still, I don't condemn those who do smoke. That is their business. Last thing before I take over your blog here...that whole post was a joke and I hope people knew I wasn't dissing George or smokers for real. *sigh*

[Sprite's Keeper]

Lisa, I get ya completely. I actually laughed when I read your post (as I often do when I read your blog) and got the joke.

Sue, I love you very much and will see you at Starbucks this weekend. John and Sprite are on their own!

Kirst, I understand exactly. Funny how us former smokers tend to be the ones more repulsed by it than nonsmokers.

[HeatherPride]

wow, I totally remember the candy cigarettes and how "grown up" and cool we felt walking around with them. now I can't believe they were marketed to kids! times have sure changed!

[Wendy]

Down here in Podunk SC you can still buy candy cigarettes at some stores. Noah came home with them once and I flipped out. Even though I'm a smoker.