Airee Accusations

Ahem. Good morning, everyone. My name is Harrison, affectionately known as Harry, although the kid refers to me as "Airee." I let it slide. For now.

I have been living with Sprite since my owners brought her home a little more than a year and a half ago. Since then, Blue and I have been subjected to torture on a regular basis at the hands of this pint sized, pinching, hitting, biting, toy stealing toddler, who on a daily basis continues to charm my owners into thinking she's some sort of miniature Einstein.

I can no longer sit quietly and allow this to happen. The kid is getting way too much credit for being a kid. Just look at this display of completely normal toddler behavior and the copious amounts of digital film wasted on her.

There she is, just sitting in her high chair, trying to snap the restraints into place and then take them out. That's it. She spent a good hour doing this, crying when they tried to take her out of the chair, and getting her way when they relented and allowed her to disobey their authority until bedtime.

My owners grabbed the camera and proceeded to get several angles of her snapping and unsnapping the restraint.

Snapping..

Unsnapping..

Wait! Don't forget the look of concentration!

There's more, but I'm starting to bore MYSELF here.

Oh, and get this! They're high fiving her for teaching herself how to escape the very restraints put there for her own safety! They might as well show her where they store the matches!

That's right. Clap on about your little accomplishments. You go on thinking you're all that and a bag of Milk Bones. I'd like to see you catch a ball thrown 50 yards.

Is it all about cute? Is that what she thinks is making her so popular? Well, look at that. See? I can do cute.

Is this what my life is going to be? A side dish forced to live quietly in her main entree shadow? I used to be the star. Yeah, Blue's there too, but I'm the brains in this operation and this diaper wearing diva has stolen all my attention, affection, and accolades, not to mention my space on the bed.

I am using this blog to call attention to this mis-use of praise and manipulation of attention and expose her for what she really is:

A toddler.

Thank you. Have a good day.

Oh, um, can you let me out really quick? I gotta go.

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Blue: What'd I miss?

Comments

[Kirsten]

LOL So true! Your posts like this always give me a giggle. You've got a little houdini on your hands.