The Old Switcheroo

Dear little girl who looks like my daughter,

You're cute and all, but we need to get some things straight. I'm not falling for this little bait-n-switch you seem to have set up. I know you're not mine.

That's right. I know what you're doing. I figured it out. It's not fun anymore. Game over, let's go back to the way things were, please.

How long did you think this little scam would work? Did you think I would not notice when I dropped my adorable, always smiling, always innocent Sprite off at daycare and then arrived that SAME AFTERNOON to pick her up and they gave me you instead?

Did you think I would not become suspicious when fifteen minutes later, my "daughter" refused to stay put in her car seat and tried to launch an attack on my belting efforts with cheerios? And then screamed out randomly the ENTIRE ride home?

Did you think I would not question when you all of the sudden decided bedtime would no longer be at 7PM and should now be updated to "Whenever I crash and try to take a dog down with me"?

Did you think you would pull the wool over our eyes when you miraculously started saying "please" and "thank you", yet now you can't sit at your bench like a big girl?

Now, to the untrained eye, you're very good at this masquerade. They all believe you to be Sprite. You've even fooled Sprite's daddy once in a while. But me? Oh no. I know an impostor when I see one.

Even Blue, Sprite's most loyal follower, is wary of you, and she's not the crunchiest milk bone in the box.

You've had some kind moments here and there and it's appreciated while we're forced to watch over you until our real daughter can be returned to us, but your chameleon abilities are starting to wane in color and the trueness of your actual nature is starting to show through.

Sprite's daddy has chalked it up to teething. Sprite's grandparents have summed it up as growing pains. I am calling this "Sprite" a spade. You are not my daughter.

Give me back my daughter! (Or at least one who's potty trained already. That would be acceptable.)

(And if daycare thinks they can charge me for both of you, they have another think coming..)

Much obliged and growing impatient,

Sprite's Mommy

PS- And when you return Sprite to us, please make sure she's had a bath first..Who knows where she's been?

Comments

[PrettyNeato]

Oh no! Missing Sprite? I hope whoever has her, makes sure she comes back clean and potty trained.

[Jonny's Mommy]

And Sprite Impostor honey, while your there, bring back my Jonathan too. He's also been replaced with a "fake Jonathan."

Thanks, Sweets.

[andrea frazer]

Don't you know that Puck's mom said the same thing to him?

Hey, mind if I link you from one of my BabyCenter posts at some point? This would be a great topic of discussion. Let me know via my blog or at BabyCenterAndrea@Yahoo.com

And thanks for reading me. No pressure to link if you don't want crazy traffic. Everyone blogs for different reasons and I respect your thoughts on it either way!

Hmmm... rambling. Good luck getting your daughter back. Check the pantry.